410 I Am Free From Resentment_February 2018 Wednesday Week 3

Wisdom Wednesdays-#410 February 14th The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast I Am Free From Resentment “The worst resentment that anybody can have is one you feel justified to keep.” ~Louis Gossett, Jr. Happy Valentines day everyone…and if you hate this holiday because you feel you have no one to love you…just know you will be my valentine, as I’m going to love you.   And on that note of love…let’s talk about hate: Is there someone who gets on your nerves, and they don’t even have to interact with you, just seeing them or the thought of them gets you all riled up?   Why is that?   Why do we allow people to steal our joy? And I just realized what I said, I said “why do we allow people.”   People don’t do anything to us, we decide how we allow them to rile us up. The control is never up to them…our control is given up to emotions that make us feel powerless.   Emotions like anger, sadness, resentment, jealousy, and other such reactions become our masters as we allow our joy and calm to be caged up. The feelings we want to feel are never taken away from us, but it’s rather we lock them away. We delude ourselves thinking someone or something made us feel or act a certain way. Which is probably because it’s easier to blame someone, than it is for us to take ownership in how we feel 100% of the time.   And today a lightbulb came over my head when I was driving home. There are certain people who drive me insane. Their energy and how they treat me rub me the wrong way. You know those type of people who won’t say anything to you unless you say it first. You know those type of people who act all nice to you only when they want something from you. You know those type of people who have a bad attitude about everything around them and make sure to let everyone know it as well. And yes, I am generalizing as they probably aren’t in a bad attitude all of the time…maybe only 99.99% of the time.   And if you’re like me, you’ve been here many times before where in your mind you make excuses for them. You justify their behaviors reasoning about how bad their life must be, how hard they’ve had it, or how they have a lot going on in their life that we don’t know about. And maybe you feel pity for them because it must be hard living in the pain that they’ve chosen to trap themselves in.   But I’m tired; I’m tired of making excuses for people being rude, mean, and ungrateful in their lives. I’m tired of people not seeing me as a person and treating me unkind or with disdain because of our energy conflicting. And today I decided to stop making excuses for people, and I decided to love them…silently. I stopped making stories up about them being great people and how they’re just having a hard time. And I decided to see them as they are, with no ill will in my heart towards them. I decided to let go of my resentment towards them because it was only hurting me.   And you know what? I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, I felt my mind a little more free, and I felt more energy within me.   Now I’m not saying that we can’t reason in our mind why people are the way they are. We don’t know people’s pains, and we don’t know their coping mechanisms they utilize to push others away. So if it helps you to love someone to tell a story of how they’re hurting, then do it. For me, I’ve been doing it for years, and it works sometimes, and sometimes I just get tired of their consistent negativity and hatefulness…and it takes energy to keep telling myself the story of how great they are when I don’t feel that way in my life about them. And so I decided to stop making up stories, and to let go of my inner anger towards them.   I was wasting energy trying to force a story, and it was wearing me out. I’ve come to the realization that I won’t reach everyone, and it’s not my place to change everyone. It’s only my goal to reach those who want to be reached…and some people will take longer to reach. But it’s not my mission to change those who don’t want to be changed. I pray to have an open heart, to free myself from resentment, and to be here to help any way that I can.   So I’m not giving up on people; I’m giving up on keeping resentment in my life. I’m giving up on trying to make people something they’re not. I will love them, and I will hope for the best for them, but I ‘m too tired putting energy into people who only drain me.   So if you’re feeling drained too, let’s make a promise to each other…let’s pivot from resentment from whatever is draining us in our lives, and let’s choose to create peace in our lives. For me, the people I’m talking about have done nothing to me; well, besides be who they are around me.   I’ve allowed myself to be reactive, and powerless, as I’ve allowed my emotions to control me. So I am choosing to pivot from resentment, into love of life.   In the old story, I tried to make it all about them, to focus on them…to force my love towards them. It drained me to put all my attention to that thought or task, and so I’m widening my reach of love to everything.   I’m going to love myself a little more by releasing the anger and resentment, as I focus on peace and love. I’m going to love them more by accepting them as they are, and I’ll be here if they’re ever ready to see life a different way. And I’m going to love the world a little more by putting more of my energy into it…instead of being so blind trying to help only one person who doesn’t get along with me. I’ve tried to make my peace, and that’s all I can do. I’m releasing resentment, so I can hold onto love of all the beautiful things around me that I’ve been missing by keeping my area of focus so narrow.   Today’s Personal Commitment:What’s draining you in your life right now? For me I needed that time alone in my car to come to my aha moment. So maybe it will take a little time in figuring that out for yourself. So I am challenging you to take to the task of finding the energy sucking people and things in your life. This week take notice and keep asking yourself how I am feeling right now? And if you are feeling worn out and drained…ask yourself why.   Keep note of your energy “suckers” and come back to look at them at the end of your week.   The reason we don’t change our ways is because we are always trying to fix something, we are always trying to do a new way, we are always looking to add that silver bullet into the mix that will fix and change everything. But I think there’s something more powerful that’s missing before we go towards a true and lasting change.   And that thing is asking…what is the old story I was telling? Your mind is like a film reel. We keep coming back to the same ending because we are playing the same movie reel, the same footage, and yet we are expecting different results. But if we look at the old story we’ve been telling of why we are powerless, of why we allow our emotions to get the best of us…then we can begin doing something different. Knowledge is only half power; knowledge with action is power.   So what’s the old story that’s keeping you stuck? What’s the old story that keeps bringing you back to ideas, people, or things that drain you? Until you label the story and begin to see it for what it is, it won’t matter how many new things you try because you will continue to keep playing the same movie reel in your mind. So, become aware of your old story first, and then put in a new reel to change the ending.   I Am Free From Resentment   Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together, Personal Development Life Coach- Chris O'Hearn Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247     Music by: - Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. - I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide